Pretz – Crispy Pizza
Pretz is a well-established brand and I’ve long since been indoctrinated into the Glico family of products like Pocky since early childhood. It’s too late for me. I can’t escape. Lest they do something real scandalous like poison their products or lace them with laxatives, I don’t think I can break free from their grasp. It’s gotten to the point where I sometimes mindlessly pick up flavours even if they don’t really appeal to me. Pizza flavour is sadly, one of those cases.
To be clear, I am not some deviant who doesn’t like pizza. I’ve yet to meet someone who doesn’t enjoy some form of pizza, whether they be vegan, or actually allergic to wheat. It’s the great unifier, as I call it, that brings people of various backgrounds together in a shared love. I mention this so that you don’t think I’m crazy for not liking pizza flavoured products. I just think that a flavour doesn’t do pizza justice, and I haven’t found products that can replicate the flavour of pizza well enough for me to think “hey, I can scratch the pizza itch with this”. Also, I do not enjoy pizza Pringles. Just sayin’.
Something interesting about these is that they claim there are 100 sticks in each box, meaning each of these pouches has 50 sticks. Given how small these are, and that I sometimes stick 4 in my mouth at a time, it’s really not that bold of a claim. These things are tiny compared to standard sticks. I should mention that the flavour moniker is crispy pizza, and the crispy part is because of the size and texture of these sticks.
These are very thin compared to the usual Pretz sticks. While they are thin, they are also very dense. I know that sounds weird given how small and dainty these look, but unlike the typical biscuit like texture of normal Pretz sticks, these are like condensed dough, like a very dense pretzel stick. The end result is less “crispy” but more crunchy, which I tend to prefer. These sticks are quite small though, so they still won’t feel substantial in any way. They remind me a lot of Cratz in texture, and I imagine these would go great as a bar snack alongside a nice cold brew. Now that I think about it, they remind me a lot of a really crunchy, narrow bread stick. Or a really overcooked thin crust pizza. Maybe I’m weird but I enjoy my pizza crusts overcooked.
The flavour is what I would think of when eating pizza flavoured snacks, not necessarily a typical pizza I would eat. When opening the pouch the smell of Parmesan cheese, tomato and oregano and garlic infect the room. I need to clarify that I have nothing against fresh Parmesan cheese. I love the stuff. It’s the preserved, bottled, shelf stable stuff that I take exception to. Not because it tastes bad, in fact it tastes delightful. The problem is that it has a very pungent, distinct smell that sticks to everything it touches. I know, based on the smell, that the cheese smell will stick to my lips long after I’ve finished the snack. Just a rant I wanted to get out of the way. The flavours comes together and do remind me of a Margherita pizza, so I’ll tolerate the smell.
The smell aside, I kind of like everything about this. While the sticks are very thin, they are also very dense. They also come in a generous quantity which makes it both great for sharing, and great for snacking on in a group. I bet these would go great as a bar snack. As long as you can get past the smell, which probably really only bothers me enough to bring it up, this is a pretty solid snack to try and I would recommend it.
